100+ Things
HoW To KeEp A HeaLthY LeVel Of iNsAniTy aNd dRiVe OtHeR PeOple iNsAne!
Yeah, so since I just got off of an eleven hour shift that suck, suckity, suck, sucked (and am at the beginning of my work week...ahhh, Monday- Hoorey Beer!)...I brought out an old work related email that Kira sent to me. Thanks Kira. I know Monday is the start of your work week but you really should consider joining me at the pub for a shot of something yummy and a game of pool.
1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car and point your hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
3. Insist that your e-mail address be: zena-goddess-of-fire@companyname.com
4. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
5. Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronized chair dancing.
6. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN."
7. Develop an unnatural fear of staplers.
8. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
9. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors."
10. Reply to everything someone says with, "That's what you think."
11. Adjust the tint on your monitor so that the brightness level lights up the entire work area. Insist to others that you like it that way.
12. Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy."
13. Don'tuseanypunctuationorspaces
14. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
15. Ask people what sex they are.
16. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
17. Sing along at the opera.
18. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
19. Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Wear them one day after your boss does. (This is especially effective if your boss is the opposite gender.)
20. Send e-mail to the rest of the company to tell them where you're going. For example: If anyone needs me, I'll be in the bathroom.
21. Put mosquito netting around your cubicle.
22. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.
23. Hum when you ride an elevator.
....AnD tHe FiNaL wAy tO aNnOy PeOpLe:
24. Send this to everyone in your address book, even if they sent it to you.
1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car and point your hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
3. Insist that your e-mail address be: zena-goddess-of-fire@companyname.com
4. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
5. Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronized chair dancing.
6. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN."
7. Develop an unnatural fear of staplers.
8. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
9. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors."
10. Reply to everything someone says with, "That's what you think."
11. Adjust the tint on your monitor so that the brightness level lights up the entire work area. Insist to others that you like it that way.
12. Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy."
13. Don'tuseanypunctuationorspaces
14. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
15. Ask people what sex they are.
16. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
17. Sing along at the opera.
18. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
19. Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Wear them one day after your boss does. (This is especially effective if your boss is the opposite gender.)
20. Send e-mail to the rest of the company to tell them where you're going. For example: If anyone needs me, I'll be in the bathroom.
21. Put mosquito netting around your cubicle.
22. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.
23. Hum when you ride an elevator.
....AnD tHe FiNaL wAy tO aNnOy PeOpLe:
24. Send this to everyone in your address book, even if they sent it to you.
Labels: A Slice Of Spam
Posted by Aza at 10:13 PM::
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3 Thoughts On The Subject
freaquin sweet
I looked over the site but was unable to find an email address?
I sent it to him.
Sorry about that, when looking for the email addy I didn't scroll dowm far enough to see that his profile, links etc. are at the bottom of his page.
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