Surreptitious Psychosis
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Putting the "fun" in disfunctional since 1978!

Name: Aza
From: Florida, United States

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    Sunday, May 07, 2006

    100+ Things

    1. Some people think these "100 Things" lists are stupid and narrow, some think they are a brilliant insight into one's personality/mind. I think these lists are somewhere in the middle of the two extreme lines of thought.

    2. My favorite color is grey but for the most part I see the world in black and white.

    3. I am mentally color blind.

    4. I watch cartoons. A LOT.

    5. I don't want to have children any time soon (if ever).

    6. When I was 11 my mother died. I was more upset for my father than I was for myself.

    7. I talk to animals like they're people, not babies.

    8. I think my Grandmother is/was a Saint.

    9. I truly enjoy independent films and B movies- even the really shitty ones.

    10. When reading a really good book I have to use Visine because sometimes I forget to blink.

    11. I have a nasty temper.

    12. I think I'm much more intelligent than I really am.

    13. I'm obsessive compulsive.

    14. My close friends think I'm much more intelligent than I really am.

    15. I used to drink too much.

    16. I spent 3,800 dollars at a local bar in a little less than 5 months. I only bought for myself.

    17. I ended up in the hospital for 9 hours on IV fluids and antibiotics. They thought I might have been going into kidney failure.

    18. The song "It's A Wonderful World" sung by Louis Armstrong makes me sad, because I believe it.

    19. Every Christmas Eve TBS airs the movie A Christmas Story for 24 hours. If someone in the house changes the channel, hell breaks loose.

    20. I think Jean Sheppard was a genius.

    21. I've been told I should have been a lawyer.

    22. It pisses me off when I tell people my major is Forensics and they automatically tell me CSI is their all time favorite show.

    23. I fucking hate bad breath.

    24. I lean toward misanthropic views.

    25. I think testicles are stupid looking.

    26. One of the best x-mas gifts I ever got was a new vacuum cleaner. It was a mini, quiet shop vac. It rocks!

    27. I love Akira Kurasawa movies.

    28. I wouldn't be surprised if I ended up a math major or in a mental ward.

    29. I have a mortality complex.

    30. Red nail polish pisses me off.

    31. I don't paint my nails unless it's Halloween.

    32. I adore the way fall smells.

    33. Fall is my favorite season.

    34. I think people who say "Is is hot enough for ya?" should be made to spend a few weeks in hell and then asked not to ask stupid questions.

    35. Badly behaved children make me want to take off my shoe and bitch slap their parents with it.

    36. I fucking hate people who seriously bitch about stupid shit like it's the end of the world. I think they should be made to visit a children's cancer ward. Then I think they should be bitch slapped for thinking their problems are worse than everyone else's.

    37. I refuse to curse in front of children.

    38. I hope children don't read my Blog

    39. I do not believe PMS is a valid excuse for being a bitch.

    40. I hate seeing a man scratch his balls or spit in public (unless I'm at a baseball game, then it's funny).

    41. I believe my cats laugh at me when I do stupid things.

    42. I am competitive but won't compete if I don't think I have a good chance of winning.

    43. I don't keep my mouth shut nearly as much as I should.

    44. Ignorance is not knowing, stupidity is not willing to learn. I fucking hate stupid people.

    45. There are three major things that make me insane; child abuse, animal abuse and seeing old people cry.

    46. I love talking to old people. Really old people.

    47. I am pro capitol punishment and really could care less what people think of me because of it.

    48. I have been to Italy and Egypt.

    49. I know how to knit.

    50. I was taught by a group of Pagan women who had a knitting circle called "Knit N' Bitch".

    51. I wanted to take piano lessons a year ago but refused to sign up and go unless my dad did too.

    52. I took piano lessons last year.

    53. I love cold, rainy, blustery days. I think days like that were made just for me.

    54. I watch Godzilla movie marathons.

    55. I hope I hear wind chimes when I die.

    56. I think the Spice Girls and N' Sync were created in a lab.

    57. I wrote myself a letter when I was a little girl and wrote on the outside of the envelope "Do not open until you're 21". I found the letter a few years ago and was very sad when I read it.

    58. My sister stands 5'8" and weighs 115. I stand 5'5" and weigh 125. She thinks I'm fat.

    59. I am utilitarian and don't like materialistic people.

    60. I wear very little make-up.

    61. The only time I wear make-up is when I go to work or to an important event.

    62. I love lightly scented lavender lotion.

    63. When I'm sick I wash my feet 10 or 15 times a day in really hot water. It makes me feel better.

    64. I had a pet opossum once, he could not be released into the wild because he had hip dysplasia. His name was Fred.

    65. I taught my cat Bella how to fetch.

    66. She only wants to play at 2am.

    67. I think people who talk on their cell phones while at cash registers- in the grocery store, gas station, the pharmacy I work at- are inconsiderate and selfish. They make me want to throw things at them.

    68. Gossip is a waste of fucking time. If you can't say it to their face, you shouldn't say it at all (unless you've already said it to their face or fully intend to).

    69. I'm not very tactful.

    70. Even though my nose is pierced, I very rarely wear a tiny stud in it.

    71. When I got my nose pierced it felt like someone punched me in the face (served me right).

    72. It is widely known that when I die, my sister is not invited to the funeral.

    73. When I look at pictures of the universe and galaxy I feel very small.

    74. I'm a junk food vegetarian.

    75. I'm scared to swim if I can't see the bottom. I believe sharks, pirahanna or alligators will eat me.

    76. I think peeing is a waste of time.

    77. While 7 is my favorite number, I'm strangely attracted to 3.

    78. I function better at night.

    79. I was at one time (and am still to some degree) obsessed with dinosaurs.

    80. I think OJ Simpson did it.

    81. I empathize with Van Gogh.

    82. Bigots piss me off. I can think of a dozen good reasons to hate a person and none of them have a thing to do with race, religion, sex or creed.

    83. I think that might make me a creative bigot.

    84. Actually, I think that just makes me a hateful person.

    85. I eat in my sleep.

    86. I always wear my seatbelt. Without exception.

    87. I can touch the bottom on my nose with my tongue.

    88. I think Rod Serling was brilliant.

    89. I won't purchase products that are tested on animals.

    90. The fact that the hospital I was born in was turned into a church makes me feel odd.

    91. When I was little I wanted to marry the professor off of Gilligan's Island.

    92. When I was a little older I wanted to marry Belker off of Hill Street Blues.

    93. I know how I died in my last life.

    94. Sometimes I wake myself up laughing.

    95. I've played drunken Twister and won.

    96. I can watch surgery on the Discovery channel while eating and don't understand people who can't.

    97. I've been banned from Pet Stores- I've also shut a number of them down.

    98. I love lightening storms at night.

    99. I've been robbed at gunpoint.

    100. When people ask me if the glass is half empty or half full I tell them I believe it is a figment of their imagination.

    101. I find almost all chick flicks disturbing.

    102. I can't stand people who know but refuse to speak proper English. "Phat", "Ain't" and words of that ilk are just fucking stupid altogether. I suspect people who use those words are mildly retarded.

    103. There are times when I sound like a sailor with tourette's syndrome.

    104. I believe in Karma.

    105. People who don't acknowledge me when I let them out into traffic make me want to take a tire iron to their windshield. I think they are ungrateful shits.

    106. The different aspects of my personality tend to be contradictory at times.

    107. I hate nasty confrontations but am very good at them.

    108. I love herbal and floral tea, especially jasmine.

    109. I was home schooled after my mom died.

    110. I got my high school diploma at 16.

    111. I did not start college until I was 24.

    112. I got married two weeks after my 19th birthday on January 1st 1998.

    113. I was offered a full scholarship into our local police academy when I was 20. I was in a car accident three months later and my doctor said in my medical report that a back injury I sustained would prevent me from the physical challenges in the academy's program. The academy took my doctors word for it against my protest (and a second opinion) and did not enroll me.

    114. I still have yet to experience any back problems from that particular car accident.

    115. I love horror movies.

    116. I once verbally tore into a woman in a grocery store for yelling at one of her employees in front of everyone for no reason. I announced to her and the entire store that she gave women who aren't fucking bitches while having their menstrual cycle a bad name. I then offered to buy her a Midol and a tampon.

    117. The only thing I really miss about summer when it's gone is not hearing crickets chirp at night.

    118. I think Irish accents are hot.

    119. I've only gotten somewhere around 32 stitches between the ages of 4 and 27.

    120. My injuries included: Krazy K accidentally (?) slammed my head into a table when I was 4 (3 or 4 stitches over my right eye). I dropped a stack of plates on my foot when I was 6. I thought my mom had them, she yanked, we both let go (13 stitches across the top of my right foot). Sliced my arm open on a broken coke bottle when I was 9 (8 stitches right inner arm at wrist). Cut my hip open on a piece of metal when I was 15 (9 stitches over right hip bone).

    121. I have panic attacks over senseless shit yet even though I know it's senseless shit I still freak out.

    122. I'm scared of hurricanes.

    123. I like to make people laugh, especially my dad.

    124. My hair is almost to my waist. It pisses me off on a regular basis and I threaten to cut it all off on a regular basis.

    Uhhh, that's it for now. I'm sure I'll be adding to this list.

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    4 Thoughts On The Subject

    Blogger Lushy said...

    #105 proves that we should never drive together. We would stop the car and bitch slap the person who failed to give thanks for being allowed into traffic. My standard rant is "Where's my courtesy wave, motherfucker?"

    3:24 PM  
    Blogger Aza said...

    HA! Mine is "You're welcome, dickhole!"

    11:17 PM  
    Blogger Hunter Dimmick said...

    I love your blog ive been reading everything for hours..

    6:39 PM  
    Blogger Hunter Dimmick said...

    My mother says fucking asshole say thank you...then she says bitch

    6:40 PM  

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