A day of infamy? Hardly!

Twenty eight years ago today at this very moment, 7:10am Lil' Aza clawed her way out of the womb and was hurled into the world like an obscenity-spewing cannonball. How should those around me pay homage and express their undying gratitude for every breath I take, you ask? Being the ever humble person I am, all I ask for is a position of dictatorship. I know, I know… you’re shocked that I’d ask for so little considering I’ve contributed so much to the world. That’s just another amazing quality I exude…modesty.

Oh sure, there are some that would say my earth coming was the outcome of an unholy satanic rite. But they’re just being dramatic- a result of having watched The Omen one too many times.