100+ Things
Fuck Off Friday
Welcome to the third installment of “Fuck Off Friday”! The “Fuck Off Friday” journey began with this post. With all of the people, places, and things I’d like to tell to “Fuck Off” an idea was born. Can’t say it on your own blog but feel the need to tell someone, someplace or something to fuck off? Jump in and leave your very own special fuck off dedication in the comments.
Fuck Off Methadone Addict! I put up with pieces of shit like you in the pharmacy I slave at every day. I listen to your fucked up stories and lies every time you pick up your Methadone (my tax dollars pay for). You say you’re in a “program” and you’re getting your life straight. What the fuck ever! Every month you pop up with new burn marks on your fingers and lips. Instead of following that program and shaking the crack monkey, you enjoy being anally assaulted by him and the Methadone monkey. I do not pity you. You are a sorry piece of shit that will end up taking up space in an unmarked grave in potter’s field! You know who I pity? I pity the Morphine addict that is addicted to the shit because they’ve spent years in pain fighting cancer. Unlike you, they aren’t addicted by choice and they are literally fighting- for their lives. They aren’t offered a program, they aren‘t offered free drugs. The government gives you drugs to shake your habit which you turn into another habit. Meanwhile my cancer, Hep., HIV, MS., etc. patients suffer and die miserably because they can’t afford their medication. You want some sympathy asshole? Look it up in the dictionary. Here’s a hint for you….it’s between shit and syphilis!
Fuck Off Dog! I love you but damnit, your decision to fuck with that cat has had me worried sick! You know better!
Fuck Off Fellow Commuter! I didn’t have to let you out in traffic, I could have left your ass sitting there for another hour. What? It’s too much trouble to ask the person on your cell to hold a moment so you can acknowledge that I did something nice for you with a nod or wave, you ungrateful traffic Nazi? Well to hell with you and lesson learned! If I see you again not only will I not let you out I’ll get out of my car and explain to the person behind me why they shouldn’t let you out either! As Lushy would say; "Where’s my courtesy wave motherfucker!?"
Fuck Off Krazy K and Pitiful J! How fucking hard is it to pick up your phone and call dad for father’s day!? He did the best he could raising us as a bi-lateral paraplegic, that worked his ass off every fucking day, while fighting for his and our sanity because of an abusive alcoholic wife/mother. So she kills herself in a car accident 17 years ago and you two split. That’s real fucking nice. He’s an amazing person and a great dad; he deserves better than that. Every holiday I watch you break his heart and every holiday I hate you a little more for it. Ya know what really makes me sick? If either of you sorry fuckers called today he’d pick right up where you left off and be grateful for the call. Fuck both of you! I take comfort in knowing that you’ve got a special place reserved in hell for the way you‘ve treated him. And when you get there, give mom my best!
Fuck Off Shitty Tattoo Artist! You could have fucking warned me that you were starting- then maybe I wouldn’t have jumped and you wouldn’t have “slipped”. Now I’m going to have to get it fixed you retarded douchbag! Unlike you, my body isn’t covered in 8 billion flaming fucking skulls- that tattoo is a tribute to my dad; it means a lot to me- thanks for fucking that up.
And there you have it! That concludes this weeks craptastic Fuck Off Friday! Didn’t like it? Feel free to add yourself to the list.
Fuck Off Methadone Addict! I put up with pieces of shit like you in the pharmacy I slave at every day. I listen to your fucked up stories and lies every time you pick up your Methadone (my tax dollars pay for). You say you’re in a “program” and you’re getting your life straight. What the fuck ever! Every month you pop up with new burn marks on your fingers and lips. Instead of following that program and shaking the crack monkey, you enjoy being anally assaulted by him and the Methadone monkey. I do not pity you. You are a sorry piece of shit that will end up taking up space in an unmarked grave in potter’s field! You know who I pity? I pity the Morphine addict that is addicted to the shit because they’ve spent years in pain fighting cancer. Unlike you, they aren’t addicted by choice and they are literally fighting- for their lives. They aren’t offered a program, they aren‘t offered free drugs. The government gives you drugs to shake your habit which you turn into another habit. Meanwhile my cancer, Hep., HIV, MS., etc. patients suffer and die miserably because they can’t afford their medication. You want some sympathy asshole? Look it up in the dictionary. Here’s a hint for you….it’s between shit and syphilis!
Fuck Off Dog! I love you but damnit, your decision to fuck with that cat has had me worried sick! You know better!
Fuck Off Fellow Commuter! I didn’t have to let you out in traffic, I could have left your ass sitting there for another hour. What? It’s too much trouble to ask the person on your cell to hold a moment so you can acknowledge that I did something nice for you with a nod or wave, you ungrateful traffic Nazi? Well to hell with you and lesson learned! If I see you again not only will I not let you out I’ll get out of my car and explain to the person behind me why they shouldn’t let you out either! As Lushy would say; "Where’s my courtesy wave motherfucker!?"
Fuck Off Krazy K and Pitiful J! How fucking hard is it to pick up your phone and call dad for father’s day!? He did the best he could raising us as a bi-lateral paraplegic, that worked his ass off every fucking day, while fighting for his and our sanity because of an abusive alcoholic wife/mother. So she kills herself in a car accident 17 years ago and you two split. That’s real fucking nice. He’s an amazing person and a great dad; he deserves better than that. Every holiday I watch you break his heart and every holiday I hate you a little more for it. Ya know what really makes me sick? If either of you sorry fuckers called today he’d pick right up where you left off and be grateful for the call. Fuck both of you! I take comfort in knowing that you’ve got a special place reserved in hell for the way you‘ve treated him. And when you get there, give mom my best!
Fuck Off Shitty Tattoo Artist! You could have fucking warned me that you were starting- then maybe I wouldn’t have jumped and you wouldn’t have “slipped”. Now I’m going to have to get it fixed you retarded douchbag! Unlike you, my body isn’t covered in 8 billion flaming fucking skulls- that tattoo is a tribute to my dad; it means a lot to me- thanks for fucking that up.
And there you have it! That concludes this weeks craptastic Fuck Off Friday! Didn’t like it? Feel free to add yourself to the list.
Labels: Fuck Off Friday
Posted by Aza at 10:18 AM::
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4 Thoughts On The Subject
I'm with chunks, I think you are really on to something here. It's amazing how many people inadvertently get hooked on pain killers. I've known people with chronic back pain that are looped 95% of the time.
I'd like to say FUCK OFF! to my neighbour, who thinks he has license to grope me in public and then sulks when I pull away and scold him. He also comes to my house and starts shouting my name even before he's stepped onto the walkway, before he's anywhere near the front door. Then he knocks and knocks and shouts my name some more.
Hello, first of all I don't need everyone around to know that you're attempting to see me; second, I don't need everyone to think I'm not home (when really, I'm just not answering the door). And third, since when do you holler someone's name BEFORE you even knock on the door? I don't know anybody else who does this, have NEVER known anyone to do this.
So, neighbour, FUCK OFF.
Thanks for the podium, Aza. :)
Yay, I needed to vent.
Fuck off boss who won't let me leave two hours early to spend time with my parents, but you will give the girl who has worked here HALF THE AMOUNT OF TIME I HAVE license to leave whenever she wants.
Fuck off black mercedes that slammed on the brakes FOR NO REASON and made me leave half the rubber from my tires on Santa Monica Blvd.
Fuck off neighbor who complains about the smell of cigarette smoke coming from my visiting friend. CLOSE YOUR DOOR!
q
Thanks for letting me vent. I'll be sure to come back next Friday.
Cheers.
Wow! You are really onto something here, the list could just go on and on, really. I love it. Can't think of any fuck off's right now, give me a week.haha
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