Dinner for 10 (small villages)...

So my menu is less than traditional but who gives a crap? My guests will just have to understand 4 simple truths- 1/ It’s the holiday’s, I’m busy. 2/ It’s better than nothing. 3/ They’re welcome to feast on my craptastic always entertaining festive attitude. And 4/ There’s no bill at the end of the meal.

~Whore derves~

Awesome Pumpkin Spice Graham crackery dip (that I’m going to claim I made from scratch) to put on cookies - Check
Nilla Wafers and Ginger Snaps - Check
800 Deviled Eggs - Check
Enough sliced cheese to constipate an elephant - Check
Loads of those little “designer” crackers (that’ll make everyone think I’m classy) for cheese - Check
Triscuits (loaded with fiber- insert evil laugh here) and Wheat Thins in case people hate designer crackers - Check

~Mains & Sides~

Turkey - Check
Ham - Check
Metric ton of Stuffing - Check
5 gallons of Gravy - Check
Canned Yams (but I'm going to say I picked them myself) - Check
That Cranberry flavored gel crap in a can - Check
4 billion red potatoes for homemade mashed taters - Check
Boots to mash taters - Check
Creepy Cheesy broccoli rice casserole (that I’ll probably hate) - Check
Dinner Rolls - Check
Sweet Potato casserole - Check

~Dessert~

Pineapple Upside Down Cake - Check
Cupcakes - Check
Peach Pie (I’m also claiming I made from scratch) - Check

~Extras~

First Aid kit - Check
Pepto Bismol - Check
Prep H - Check
911 on speed dial - Check
Alibi - Check


Now I'm really poor. Happy Thanksgiving, you're not getting shit for Christmas!

Wow, I really needed that!

and didn't even know it.

Sometimes you don’t realize just how fast life is moving and the impact stressful situations are making until you take a minute and step out of it all; when you’re granted a momentary respite.

I went golfing yesterday. Nothing really stood out about the game. The weather was nice- I thought it might rain by the 9th hole but it held off, the course is one of my favorites, the company was fabulous (as usual), I didn’t miss a single green off the tee, I hit my irons better than usual and after only 7 months of playing I scored a 96. There was nothing extraordinary about the game. However, it was one of the most enjoyable, relaxed moments I can remember in recent memory. I was actually depressed when it was over.

Now, back to the real world containing election bullshit, despondent husband’s, sick father’s, doctors appointments, financial woes, divorces, ass loads of laundry, etc., etc., etc….

I think I might start going back to yoga class.